fetish diary A Month in the Life of a Jockstrap Fetishist

Welcome to the journal of a 30-something guy who has been sexually aroused by jockstraps since the age of 12. Not that I'm into labels, but some of you may want to know my basic sexual orientation: I'm married and am sexually attracted to both women and men. I masturbate to images of naked adult men, especially guys wearing jockstraps, and I often visit gay chat rooms to role-play, usually locker-room scenes. I've started this journal as a way of sharing thoughts and feelings with other guys who feel the way I do about jockstraps, and as a way of setting free some closely-guarded secrets that otherwise tend to get locked away to fester.  I'll be honest in stating my sexual activities and sexual thoughts as often as I can, and hopefully the results will be interesting--and perhaps arousing.

*****

Just found this nice post from A.S.J-S (11/23/01): "I can remember sneaking into my dad's room and finding his old jock in the same drawer where he kept his Penthouse magazines. I wasn't entirely sure what it was, but it was exotic and erotic and I remember secretly trying it on." Love to find postings from other guys into jockstraps. Makes me feel not quite so alone and unusual.

*****

I'm wearing a white Bike regular jockstrap right now, one of the newer kind that has 20% cotton content. I also have a similar gray one. Those are the only jocks I own, other than a Bike cup unit and a Bike padded cup. All are size Medium. Bike was my first jockstrap back in junior high and has become a fixed part of my fetish. I like all jockstraps, but Bikes are the only ones I want to have in my dresser drawer. I'm going to watch a DVD with my wife now, so I'll sign off for now. If she nods off early I may be back online to chat and J-O. I usually stay up late on Saturdays to masturbate, often for two or three hours straight.

*****

Wife is out, so I have some time this morning to get horny. I like to keep my chest shaved, so I'm doing that now--always turns me on when I shave body hair. I've shaved my cock and balls, but have let it grow back recently. Now I just trim the pubes short. I'm washing my two jockstraps, which I try to do a often as I can--I like a well-worn jock much more than a fresh-out-of-the box one and I like to keep em clean too. I guess I have more of an 'all-American' kind of jock fetish, as opposed to the raunchy, almost scat kind of fetish that I've heard some guys talk about. Jocks represent clean masculine athleticism to me; wearing a jockstrap makes me feel like I'm part of a team, a male group. The strap is kinda like a membership emblem. Definitely makes me feel connected to my manhood. Writing this blog sure does get me horny, especially thinking that other dudes may be reading it.

*****

So far, whenever I've added entries to this blog, I gotten very turned on. Right now I'm wearing a v-neck t-shirt and my gray jock, with my cock pulled out the side of the pouch. My dick is about 3in soft, but now it's grown to about 6in. Just put some Neutrogena Body Emulsion in my palm and beginning to massage my dick. Feels real good. I'm starting to fantasize about getting my dick sucked by a guy in a jock, but quickly I'm switching to thoughts of penetrating a jock-strapped ass. Ooops, wife just came home....

*****

After working around the house I showered and am now wearing a tight white ribbed-fabric a-shirt and gray boxer briefs & gray gym shorts, both at my ankles. I'm in my office while my wife is making dinner. Once again my cock is hard and I'm masturbating. You might be getting the impression that it doesn't take much to get me hard and you're right. I am a very horny dude all in all. I really have no idea if anyone will find these postings of interest, but it's cool to publicly expose what has always been a closely guarded secret life.

*****

Just got online to check my email and decided to make a quick post. Still a little 'unfulfilled' from the earlier session. I had just started to get really hot when my wife came home. I got the computer shut down in time and luckily my jockstrap hid the huge boner I had sprouted. Really wanted to get horny with her, but couldn't get her going as she had a lot of things to do. We'll go at it tonight. Does my wife know about my fetish? More or less. She knows I feel sexy wearing a jock and we often make love with me wearing one, but I don't think she knows the full extent of my obsession and doesn't know I fantasize so often about guys (though I've told her that I do get turned on by sexy guys, like in some of the porn we've watched).

*****

Got home from work and headed straight upstairs to strip off my work clothes and slip into my gray Bike jockstrap, gray gym shorts, white tank top, and white sweat socks. Still get a rush every time I pull on my jock and feel the straps glide up my legs. Usually, by the time the pouch is in place I'm semi-hard. I keep my two regular jockstraps in the top drawer of my dresser with my regular underwear--it gives me a minor thrill every time I pull open the drawer and see them there. I'm not into wearing a jock under work clothes (I know some guys dig this), mainly because it would be too distracting. My usual underwear is 2/(x) bikini briefs that are cut like a jock in the front. White, size Medium. Very comfortable and sexy. By the way, last night after I finished posting my last comment, I got so turned on by what I was doing that I couldn't help but bring myself to orgasm as I re-read what I had posted. I shot a huge load. I mean huge. Totally satisfying. Ended up not fooling around with my wife last night. We watched an intense movie and didn't feel very sexy afterwards. We'll probably fool around tonight--I feel like prancing around in my jockstrap and then making love to her while I'm wearing it. Maybe she'll slide her finger up my asshole--she knows I like that. I'll let u know the details tomorrow.

*****

Tonight I'm wearing my white Bike under gray Polo Sport boxers, with white t-shirt and white socks. As usual, the jockstrap has gotten me aroused and my cock is growing erect as I write this. Last night I had a great time in bed with my wife. I did a little strip show for her, leading up to pulling off my shorts and exposing my jockstrap. I stood above her on the bed as my cock grew hard in the pouch and she told me how strong and powerful I looked and that she was getting really turned on just looking at me in my jock. Loved hearing that and knowing that I still have that effect on her. I stripped off the jock and began making love to her. Such a great feeling to fill her with my hard cock and see her enjoy it. After a few minutes, I reached into our nightstand and pulled out a slim-size butt plug, KY-ed it, and handed it to her. She knew what to do with it, inserting it in me slowly but firmly. I resumed our lovemaking and felt an even greater charge as I was now being penetrated myself.

*****

Wife is asleep and I'm here in a white bathrobe and my white Bike jock and white socks. I am masturbating as I write this. The original aim of this blog was to explore and expose the details of my sexual fetish, so I guess it makes sense that I'm sexually aroused while writing. Sometimes it blows my mind that I can still generate so much erotic heat from wearing and thinking about a jockstrap--25 years after I first strapped one on! Like right now I'm thinking about how hot this strap looks on me and just how manly it makes me feel. I'm wearing an athletic supporter, so therefore I must be an athlete, and if I'm an athlete I must be a real man. That's the way it plays out in my mind. Guess a lot of this stems from my father, who was a professional athlete. No I don't have any memories about seeing him in a jock and I don't even remember him having one. But he always wanted me to be an athlete of some sort or another, and though I had a lot of athletic ability, I was never very interested in team sports. I was always a more sensitive kind of guy and I think I was probably intimidated by the other guys who went out for sports, so I never really got involved in that world much. I did run track in high school, which was the only time I wore a jockstrap for competitive sports. In fact I remember our track uniforms were so short and skimpy (thin navy blue nylon, cut high on the sides) that my white straps were clearly exposed as I ran sprints, and especially in the long jump. I remember it felt like I was running in just my jockstrap. Funny though, I think I'm more turned on now by jocks than I was back then. But I was also a lot more sexually repressed when I was younger. I didn't masturbate to orgasm until I was 17 or 18, and even then I could only get off by humping onto a pillow. I don't think I started stroking my cock to orgasm until I was in my 20's, well after I started having sex with women (I lost my virginity at 22). Now of course I can stroke and cum in a matter of minutes if I want to get off quickly, especially if I'm looking at a jockstrap or porn. But I usually prefer extended masturbation, like what I'm doing now, keeping myself stimulated for an hour or more, only coming at the point where I can't take the pleasure any more. Getting close to that point now! Taking my jock off now and putting it on the table in front of me. Oh yeah. That thing is so sexy!!! Gonna post this now and then let loose as I re-read it. Until next time...

*****

Wearing my white jock and gray boxers and gray pajama top. No socks. I'm beginning to wonder if this blog is of interest to anyone out there. It sure would make me feel good to get some feedback, even if it's a quick hello. I was trying to think today when the last time was that I actually laid eyes on a guy wearing a jockstrap. Must have been three or more years ago in the locker room of a sports club where I'd been playing racquetball. As I was heading to my locker, I saw a guy bending over with his strapped ass in clear view. I almost stumbled over him, as I passed by. I hadn't ever seen a jock-strapped dude in that changing room, so it was quite startling. But he quickly pulled on his tennis shorts and headed out and I didn't see him again. After that, I got the courage to start wearing my jock and would proudly strap it on, though there were rarely many guys there to witness it (small club). Though a lot of guys skipped the showers, I always took one after playing racquetball. Was always a little thrill when a guy would be in the gang showers at the same time, but I've never gotten aroused in public.

*****

Sometimes I can't help feeling that this double life I'm leading is a bit strange. I mean, I'm a married man, outwardly a perfect specimen of heterosexual normalcy, while at the same time I've got this lifelong jockstrap fetish and a load of simmering homosexual desire. Not that I'm complaining or even think that anything is necessarily wrong or unhealthy. Just the opposite: I love that I can feel sexy in so many different ways. I guess it's no secret to loyal readers that I'm a rather highly-sexed man (I think sometimes I even forget to mention all the masturbating I do; this morning, for instance, after having slept in just my jock, I jerked off in the downstairs bathroom while looking at my jock-strapped self in the mirror). I'm not sure how much the 'average' 30-something male ejaculates, but I almost always have one and sometimes two or three orgasms every day. I'd say the majority of those orgasms result from jockstrap or gay-related masturbation, with the remainder being sex with my wife. I try not to dwell on the conjugal sex here too much because I know a lot of jock-obsessed guys aren't into women, but I do find heterosexual sex extremely satisfying. Of course, I have no gay equivalent to compare it to, and probably never will. Well, the wife just pulled up, so that's it for now...

*****

I'm happy my wife goes to the gym several nights a week for two reasons: she's developing a toned sexy body, and her hour or so away from home gives me time to post this blog. Tonight I'm wearing my trusty white Bike, white v-neck, white gym socks. Funny how erotic certain words are to me. Just writing and seeing a word like 'gym' can get me sexually excited. I'd say my top-10 list of erotic words or phrase would be... 10) sporting goods 9) P.E. 8) Bike 7) gay 6) homosexual 5) jock fetish 4) locker room 3) protective cup 2) athletic supporter 1) jockstrap.

*****

End of the week and a long weekend ahead. As I sit here in my white Bike and t-shirt, feeling a bit uninhibited after a nice cold beer, I thought I'd share my ultimate gay sex fantasy with you. It starts in a locker room, abandoned for the day except for a lone stranger at the other end of a bank of lockers. He's tall and muscular, in his late twenties and seems to be unaware that I've entered the room. I go to my assigned locker around the corner from where he's standing, but a wall-mounted mirror allows me a clear view of him. As I start to strip off my sweaty workout clothes, I notice that he's doing the same. He peels off a white Nike t-shirt over his head, revealing a chiseled chest and perfectly toned abs. His chest is clean-shaven, with pronounced red nipples standing out against his tanned skin. I feel my cock start to bulge in my white Bike jockstrap, pushing against the confining pouch. I want this dude. Real bad. I'm now standing at my locker wearing just my jockstrap and white gym socks. I glance over at the mirror again and see the hot stud start to pull down his bright blue nylon gym shorts. No chance he's wearing a jock, but--yes! I see the white straps appear, framing his ass as the silky shorts glide down to the floor. He kicks them off and then pulls off his socks; he's naked except for his jock. And he still has no idea anyone is watching. (to be continued...)

*****

Back from vacation and sitting here in my gray Bike jock and Polo Sport gym boxers, white v-neck T-shirt. To continue the fantasy... as the hot young stranger bends over to pick up his blue nylon gym shorts, I pull my now rock-hard cock free from the side of my jock pouch. I begin to stroke my massive erection as I gaze upon the sexy dude's perfectly-shaped ass framed by the white straps of his jock. The stranger now looks all around the locker room and, thinking he's alone, starts to rub his jock pouch, slowly at first but then more aggressively. I find myself keeping pace with him, stroking my cock up and down as he glides his hand over his now bulging pouch. The stud begins thrusting his hips rhythmically, throwing his head back and flexing leg muscles. I continue to stroke my engorged cock, now harder than it's ever been, as I watch this tanned God masturbate. He now pulls his huge erection--a thick 8 inches--out the side of his pouch and we are both standing in this locker room wearing jockstraps and stroking our cocks. Then it happens. This hot muscled athlete turns and spots me in the mirror. Surprised, perhaps bemused, the young man smiles. That simple action sends me over the top and I explode, sending a current of cum into the air and all over the locker room bench. Watching me shoot my load so furiously causes my jock-buddy to unload as well, and I watch him ejaculate strand after strand of thick white fluid all over the locker room floor. Spent, we watch each other stand motionless for a minute before we begin to dress. Neither of us looks at the other as we leave the locker room. Well, that got me hard. Would love to hear about other guys' jock-related fantasies...

*****

Tonight I'm wearing my white Bike jockstrap and ribbed athletic shirt. I thought I'd share with you a few details of how I masturbate, when I'm not online or looking at porn, in other words when I'm simply masturbating with my jockstrap. Most often that is in the morning before I go to work, when I have some time to myself in the bathroom. I usually wake up with a hard-on, whether or not I've been having a sexy dream. I sleep in the nude or sometimes in a jockstrap or cup-jock under compression shorts. I'll keep the erection going as I make coffee and then head back to the master bathroom. My wife is usually still asleep. If I'm not wearing a jock, I'll pull open my dresser drawer and stare at my two Bike straps, gray and white, in the middle of my other underwear. My cock gets even harder as I pull one of the straps out and hold it in front of me, admiring the design and noting the details of the pouch and straps and Bike label. I'll then lay the jockstrap down on the floor in front of a full-length mirror and sit so I can see myself and the strap in the mirror. Now I apply some lube to my dick and begin to slowly massage it, while staring at the jockstrap. I become totally aroused as horny thoughts fill my mind: I imagine myself running in the jockstrap, my cock and balls held firmly in place; I think about locker rooms and sweaty athletes; I fantasize about some hot dude standing before me wearing just a jockstrap. But most of all I just look at the jock and get turned on by what I see--it's erotic in itself, in the same way a nice pair of breasts are or a well-hung cock is. I'll masturbate looking at this hot strap, sometimes touching it or smelling it or even sucking on it. But at the point that I'm ready to unload, I'll most often imagine the jockstrap on me, holding my cock, supporting my balls, the straps tugging into my ass. That's when I erupt, spilling my semen onto a pre-positioned tissue. Spent, fully pleasured, fully satisfied. The erotic power of the jockstrap fetish still fully intact. Anyone else have a similar routine?

*****

I was motivated to start this blog for several reasons. First, I wanted a forum to express and expose my otherwise deeply hidden sexual feelings, as a way of bringing those feelings to the wide open spaces of my own consciousness, and I guess in turn to ease some of the guilt and shame I've built up around this fetish. Another initial motivator was the hope that this blog would be a place on the Web where guys could candidly discuss their own feelings about jockstraps and share with like-minded men how their fetish behavior fit in with the rest of their lives. A virtual support group, if you will. But perhaps more than anything else, I wanted to use this journal as a way of meeting other men who share this very specific and unique sexual obsession. I wanted to know that if I exposed all the details of my jockstrap fetish, that there might be a few guys out there who could identify with my situation, understand the joys and occasional concerns of having a fetish for a piece of athletic gear, relate to being happily married while also exploring homosexual desires.

 

I was asked about my bisexuality in an email and thought I would give a little more detail. I discovered I was turned on by jockstraps the very first time I saw a picture of one when I was 10 or so, but it didn't even cross my mind that I might be attracted to guys until I was in my twenties. Whether that was due to sexual repression or just an expanding sexuality I'm not sure. I do remember the first time I was aroused by a picture of a naked dude: I was in college and had seen a magazine called Jock on a bookstore rack, It appeared to be a gay-oriented skin magazine that I assumed would be filled with pictures of men in jockstraps. I just had to get my hands on it, the only problem being that I didn't want anyone in the store to think I was a homosexual. Well, it took me a week or so to summon the courage, but late one Friday night I walked into the store and quickly grabbed the Jock magazine, without looking at it, and went to the checkout. Much to my surprise the guy at the checkstand was unfazed by my purchase and I soon headed out the door with my Jock magazine in hand (forgot to ask for a bag!). Of course, I was pretty darn excited all the way home, but when I finally got to my apartment and, with heart pounding, began to flip through the pages, I soon realized that this wasn't a magazine dedicated to jockstraps--it was just pictures of naked guys. In fact only one guy was even wearing a jockstrap and he was in construction worker gear which didn't turn me on at all. Disappointed and, to be honest, a little ashamed at looking at these naked guys, I threw the magazine in the trash. The next day I pulled it out of the trash. I wanted to see the jockstrap picture again, but I guess I also wanted to look at the pictures of the naked men. I remember thinking it was something I shouldn't be doing, but I think that only managed to get me more aroused by what I was seeing. I don't remember the specifics, but I must have masturbated. I probably was still getting off by humping a pillow at that point in my life, but I'm pretty sure I wasn't imagining penetrating any of the guys, just enjoying the visuals. But it wasn't just a dick thing, I know I did find some of the guys cute and some not so attractive, and I definitely did (and still do) respond to a defined chest and cut abs. I think the thing that really disappointed me about the one jock-strapped model was that he was not very good looking. I really wanted to see a cute guy in a jock. Soon I would.

 

[White ribbed tank top, white Bike strap] Been unable to get any private time to post in the last few days, though my fetish activity has not been on hold. On Tuesday on my way home from work I stopped at a Marshall's department store to check out their sports-related men's clothing and underwear. Looking through the racks of shorts and athletic tops was a real turn-on, especially when I found a couple of pairs of skimpy Reebok running shorts in my size (medium). I imagined myself jogging in these ultra-short polyester bottoms, with the straps of my jock easily exposed as I ran. One pair was dark blue and the other a light, almost see-thru gray. I bought them, of course, but didn't get a chance to try them on until right before bed. Man they felt great. Silky and airy and so very sexy. The next morning I pulled on my gray Bike jockstrap and the gray running shorts, along with a dark gray tank, and hit the treadmill in our exercise room. Felt so sexy working out in the new shorts. When I did the sit-ups next, I could tell that the leg straps would be readily visible if anyone were watching in front of me. I fantasized about being in a gym, with other guys noticing my strap, and me feeling proud to be wearing it.

 

[White ribbed tank top, white Bike strap] Had sex wearing my jockstrap again the other night. Very sexy of course. I came up to bed wearing a white tank and gray shorts and asked my wife if she thought my working out had been paying off. I pulled up my shirt to show off my near-washboard abs, then pulled down my shorts to show off my jockstrap. She liked the show. She was wearing gray cotton lingerie that really turns me on--with just a little tug, her large breasts easily spill over the top and I love hiking the short gown up over her nice round ass. In fact I spent a lot of time playing with her ass and ended up doing her doggie style. Getting hard just remembering that. So hot to feel the jockstrap on my ass as I thrust in and out. What was going through my head? Mostly how great it was to be inside this beautiful women. But to get myself over the top, I started to imagine that I was doing a guy, that my cock was rammin in and out of some hot stud's ass. That really got me going and I soon exploded in her.

 

[Gray running shorts, black football jersey] Strapped on my jock this morning to wear under my running shorts. Worked out on the treadmill and then did some sit-ups. Felt so sexy wearing a jockstrap while exercising. When I was done I took off the shorts and then peeled down the white jock, turning it into the 'pretzel' shape that anyone who's worn a strap recognizes. Brought back memories of Junior High gym class and finding my rolled supporter in my locker basket, where I'd left it the day before. I remember going several weeks without taking my gym clothes or supporter home to launder--they used to really have a smell to em. One time in a 6th period social studies class, some guy had his gym clothes in a paper bag to take home and a girl in the class found his supporter. She waved it around and then sling-shot it across the room. Man, was that poor dude embarrassed.

 

[Gray boxer shorts, gray tank top] Wife wasn't feeling sexy last night, so after she went to bed I spent about an hour masturbating while looking at my collection of naked guy pics. Probably have about 1000 or so images of guys on my computer, and a smaller collection of women and str8 sex scenes. I've cataloged the gay pics into a variety of folders based on what they depict: blow-jobs, erections, ass shots, kissing, sex, cum, etc. Then I have another group of jockstrap-related images, including guys in jocks, jockstrap erections, guys having sex in jocks, jock blow-jobs, jockstraps alone, jock boxes, lockerroom shots, cups, etc. Last night I spent the most time looking at the erections folder--got really hot just seeing image after image of guys proudly displaying their hard-ons. Of course I shot a huge load, but not after being continuously aroused while stroking for an hour. The ejaculation was so satisfying that I immediately began masturbating again, shooting another load after about ten minutes, this time focusing on one hot image of a tennis player with a very large, thick cock. I slept very soundly after that.